His Majesty Receives (William Holbrook Beard), Sonnet #544

He’s demanded they support his habits

Of frothing, striking, biting, and killing.

His followers, all mice, rats and rabbits,

Beg his mercy upon them, his willing

And most abject obedient subjects.

“What?” he soothes them. “I’m only kidding.

Act as you believe, not at my bidding.”

His cringing rodents think he suspects

Some treachery. Their leader, a wild hare,

Steps forward, bowing low, and says, “Please, sire.

We pledge ourselves to your every desire.

For you we would run with our asses bare!”

“Do so! As I am all you’ve ever feared!”

They ate each other when he disappeared.

My book of the first 200 of these sonnets is now available for purchase. Click here: My Human Disguise.

Gargantua (Honore Daumier), Sonnets #487 and #488

My book of the first 200 of these sonnets is now available for purchase. Click here:
My Human Disguise.

One

I am Gargantua the great.

I was born 11 months late

And 25 pounds overweight.

They say my mom did not dilate

So much as stay inebriate.

In my first 7 months I ate

Each day a raw half-ton primate

Brought to me in a silver crate.

The screaming made me salivate

Enough to fill the wide Euphrate....

Ease in bed’s my natural state.

Whenever I walk I create

Wobbles in how planets rotate

And the earth’s circle turns oblate.

Two

I’m sad I cannot copulate

Because I have not found a mate

Who can withstand my fleshy freight.

(I’ve other ways to recreate, 

So I ... what’s the word? Ends with ‘bait.’)

I write long essays to berate

The scientists with addled pate

Who say I can’t regenerate.

My dream is of a girlish Fate,

Who’ll bring me a Donna or Kate,

Who’ll match me stone for stone in weight,

And when at last I procreate

My sons will burst each kingly gate

And rid the world of love and hate.